Every writer
knows the blessing (or curse, more accurately) of writing. The superpowers of
world creation. The pure joy of instant escapism into a world completely under your control. The exhilaration of being puppet
master for both your characters and readers. The
vicarious ecstasy of slipping into the role of both handsome hero and clever
villain.
But like
anything, even writing, needs to be dosed in moderation. Here are ten signs you’ve
taken it too far:
1. You
accidentally call your wife by the name of your novel’s heroine.
Depending on
the particular circumstances of the mistake, this could be a marriage breaker.
2. You are still
in your pajamas at 5 pm on your day off.
3. You dream a
brilliant plot and scramble out of bed at 2 am to write the outline.
Usually doesn’t
sound as good in the morning as it did in the middle of the night.
4. Your friends
have stopped calling and it took you three months to notice.
The only friends
you need are in Middle Earth anyway.
5. You conflated
your boss with your story’s villain.
Oh well, the character was probably based on him, wasn't he?
6. You have more
empty coffee mugs on your desk than rejection letters.
And there are a lot of
those.
7. You work on
three manuscripts, four short stories, a platform, a query letter, an author
bio, a front cover, and a blog all in one day.
And somehow you still find time to read fifty pages of the latest fantasy epic from your favorite author.
8. Your book budget is nearly as high as your rent.
Yes this is actually my keyboard. Good thing I don't need to look at it to see where A, S and E are.... |
And you still refuse to get rid of your old books. It's okay, Gollum, I know they're precious.
9. You
correct the grammar of the local newspaper.
Where do they get these hack writers,
anyway?
10. You’ve typed
so much you can no longer read the letters on your laptop’s keyboard.
Yeah, A,
S, E, and O are all invisible on mine, and C, D, and L are close behind.
Don’t worry,
quirky, obsessed writer you. You are not alone. Maybe someday it will pay off.
Or not, in which case you better enjoy it.
I am in-debted to my readers. Without people to endure the words on my pages, I will vanish like the dodo. If you liked this post, feel free to comment below. If you didn't like it, feel free to comment below. I'll be your friend forever if you consider signing up for my weekly newsletter. You'll get a once-a-week update on my posts and NOTHING ELSE! No spam, no selling your email to third parties. Okay, if I ever get around to publishing one of these numerous books I've been working on, I might send out an email letting you know about that, but that's it! In the meantime thanks for reading.
I'm not sure I understand this idea of "too far". Isn't more always better? ;)
ReplyDeleteI am pretty sure I went "too far" like ten years ago... But I'm loving every minute of it ;)
DeleteAnother great blog, Brian. That wandering around looking vague because of the internal cloud of characters/plot/scenes is something people close to writers must endure, I guess.
ReplyDeleteIndeed! My wife is a saint for tolerating it all these years. Thanks for reading, Cindy! And for commenting.
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